Let me learn it properly from my guru

Mmmm... this guy is just livin the dream.

Happy international day of preserving the ozone layer.

Now don't be playing with me... Respect the holiday.

Don't drive your car,

don't use any hairspray,

don't even think about farting...

Okay.

What needed to be said was said.

This morning I walked down the hall to take a shower, and the cleaning ladies were just leaving the bathroom.

"Are you done cleaning the showers?" I ask.

"Yes-" one of them starts to say.

"NOOOO!!!" the other one turns to me and beckons me into the cleaning storage. She picks up a bottle and points to it. "A veeeery dangerous chemical in showers right now that I just cleaned. No shower for ten minutes!" She jabbed the skull and crossbones on the cleaner.

"Veeeery dangerous..." I nodded and walked back to my room.

I waited an hour until I went back.

Walking into the English building, I visited the restroom before going to class.

After I washed my hands, I realized the paper towels wouldn't come out of the dispenser.

No one else was in the room and I began to panic...

I started hyperventilating and right as I was about to call for help, I noticed a notice:

*EMERGENCY FEED ON THE SIDE, TURN KNOB*

Oh for the love of all that is good in this forsaken universe...

THANK HEAVENS.

-rae

P.S. This is comforting:

This, on the other hand: