Sunday, November 14

Bing Bong

I've noticed that whether or not your phone has a full keyboard to text on or not, there are still those words that can be misspelled or misinterpreted by your T9 text thing-is that what it's called?
Does anyone know what T9 means?
There are the annoying and extremely common ones like
'go' and 'in'
'home' and 'good'
'supper' and 'purses.'

I was texting someone the other day and typed out the word 'random.'
Now, I have a full keyboard, but the 's' is so close to 'd'...
And though I can't even remember who I was texting or for what purpose, it probably wasn't that big of a deal that I messed up.
Those words just seem particularly dangerous to mix up.

An extremely bored, lifeless, and 'has nothing better to do but update friends on every detail of their life like it's just one, big, portable facebook status' person could send the harmless text:
"I found a random note in my locker"
but when meticulously tricked into typing
"I found a ransom note in my locker,"
they suddenly because a person in search of a kidnapped loved one, inviting you to a full-on investigation even though they actually may be an extremely desperate, lying, and 'has nothing better to do but create fake ransom notes because they are sick of updating friends on their life like it's just one, big, portable facebook status and they actually just wanted to get out of the house even if that act itself compromises their integrity' person.

It's obvious that T9 can change lives in the most sneaky fashion.
If a message can be twisted into a whole new meaning with the two words mentioned above,
Can you even imagine what chaos 'supper' and 'purses' could cause?

Wednesday, November 10

a comic #2

Some of the best and most beautiful things I saw in Greece...
the enormous library,

the genius acoustics in the theater of Dionysus,

the pillars of the Parthenon that are still standing-







Thursday, September 16

Let me learn it properly from my guru

Mmmm... this guy is just livin the dream.

Happy international day of preserving the ozone layer.
Now don't be playing with me... Respect the holiday.
Don't drive your car,
don't use any hairspray,
don't even think about farting...
What needed to be said was said.

This morning I walked down the hall to take a shower, and the cleaning ladies were just leaving the bathroom.
"Are you done cleaning the showers?" I ask.
"Yes-" one of them starts to say.
"NOOOO!!!" the other one turns to me and beckons me into the cleaning storage. She picks up a bottle and points to it. "A veeeery dangerous chemical in showers right now that I just cleaned. No shower for ten minutes!" She jabbed the skull and crossbones on the cleaner.
"Veeeery dangerous..." I nodded and walked back to my room.
I waited an hour until I went back.

Walking into the English building, I visited the restroom before going to class.
After I washed my hands, I realized the paper towels wouldn't come out of the dispenser.
No one else was in the room and I began to panic...
I started hyperventilating and right as I was about to call for help, I noticed a notice:


Oh for the love of all that is good in this forsaken universe...


P.S. This is comforting:

This, on the other hand:

Tuesday, March 23

aww about google.

i just had fun checking out the fun languages you can change your google page to...
from hacker, to elmer fudd, to pirate.
ah... my kind of search engine.
so i was filling my car up with gas today by the micky's D's on 1600
when i came across this sign.

i don't know about you, but i've been struggling to find a workout routine that's right for me.
looks like this strapping young man has found his though.
easy, and yields quick results!
who knew throwing ninja stars away would make someone so buff so fast?
turns out i learned more than i anticipated today.
on a more serious note...
i don't know what's more concerning.
the fact that this man is going to be walking around humiliatingly disproportional, possibly for the rest of his life,
or the fact that macdonalds feels that people need to be instructed on how to throw trash away.

Saturday, February 27

governments health reform

has anyone heard of the governments back story of getting americans to start eating more healthy?
neither did i.
until i wrote it.

"One of the first sighting of what is expected to be many. Salt Circles are appearing throughout the world in various fast food restaurants shocking customers and employees alike. Professionals have translated what they could from the foreign calligraphy and are 95% sure that they are a threat from whomever or whatever is creating them. Many of the circles have similar patterns that all lead to the translation, "We are vegetables. We do not belong in the fryer." Upon further investigation, proof was found of ripped potato sacks and starch samples around the circles. FDA advises all Americans to cut French Fries, Onion Rings, and any other fried vegetable from their diet as a safety precaution. In the meantime, please eat healthy home-cooked meals as an alternative to greasy fast food. Not only for your general health, but, quite frankly, your life"

now i don't know about you, but this sounds serious enough that i'm willing to consider for even a few minutes about cutting fries and fast food out of my diet.